Coming Soon on DVD and Blu-ray

City of the Living Dead (Special Edition) 5-25-2010 – Blue Underground will be re-releasing this Fulci classic on DVD and Blu-ray. While the last release was basically Anchor Bay’s DVD put in a Blue Underground case, this version will include a documentary, and hopefully, some restoration.

Supersonic Man Double-Feature DVD 5-25-2010 – This film directed by Juan Piquer Simón (Pieces), will be released as part of a double-feature DVD by VCI entertainment.


Troma Blu-ray Releases May 25-2010 – Now I am not sure how I feel about Troma releasing Blu-rays yet, as I don’t really see the point as most of their movies were shot on sub-par equipment. Who knows though? There may be some special features we could be getting in glorious HD. They are releasing Tromeo and Juliet (Director’s Cut) and Class of Nuke Em High.

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Abominable (2006)

Now, when you hear “Sci-fi Original Movie” – the first thing that may come to your mind is ‘head for ze hills!’. Don’t worry, you will not have to quiver from bad dialogue or wince at bad CGI. You ever see Alfred Hitchcock’s “Rear Window”? Well this is “Rear Window” – with fucking BIGFOOT. Tiffany Sheppis too!! A nude scene too, may I add. Wow do I sound like a dork. Maybe because I am?

This film is nothing short of great. It gives you just enough thrills to make it into the horror genre, but provides just enough campiness (which Webster defines as “exaggerated effeminate mannerisms exhibited especially by homosexuals” — which I guess is partially true.) to make it quite an enjoyable watch.

It has okay dialogue, and the script isn’t perfect – but you have to take this movie for what it is and enjoy the ride. I think Matt McCoy plays his role perfectly, and can’t imagine anyone other than him for the role.

Basically, the plot goes somewhat like this. A couple years back, Preston and his wife go mountain climbing – and a horrific accident occurs that leaves his wife dead and Preston severely disabled. Emotionally traumatized, Preston is in the care of a male nurse. He comes back, with the nurse, to his old house, and with it, the town where the accident occurred. Only one thing has changed since Preston’s absence - Bigfoot is in town.

So he returns to his house, and dusts off some old stuff, looks through his refrigerator and finds food rotten.

A group of hot chicks arrive at the house next door, and they are VERY annoying. Insta-headache annoying. Annoying enough to where, maybe someone could come along and kill them? Maybe?

Anyway, Preston is incapable of doing much besides rolling around in his wheelchair. His nurse is an arrogant jerk and really does nothing good for Preston.

Preston decides to use his binoculars and see the goings-on in the neighborhood, and what he finds, is not exactly pleasant. Too him anyway. For the viewer, YES.

Bigfoot is hungry. Preston, slowly but surely, witnesses the deaths of three out of the four women. Including the lovely Tiffany Shepis – her nude scene gets cut off by Bigfoot )=

Eventually Preston does get involved. He ultimately saves the girl Amanda, and all seems well once they ram Bigfoot into a tree.

Cops finally show up, and the ambulance takes both Preston and Amanda away.

The cops do have quite a big problem now.

That Bigfoot, well – it looks like he has quite a family.

I would highly recommend this film for any horror/sci-fi buff out there, but even if you aren’t – I think this film has appeal for wide audiences. It’s no “Alien Apocalypse” (another Sci-Fi movie).  Hopefully more movies of this quality are released by what is now called “Syfy”, but I doubt it.

—-Review by Dawson’s Freak

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Random Quick Reviews

The Children

Plot:  Kids get sick, kids kill family.  Pretty basic stuff.  Its your standard Children of The Corn, Who Can Kill A Child? plotline.  So is it any good?  FUCK YES IT IS.

Guts n stuff

This was one of the most suspenseful movies i’ve seen in a long time.  The movie does not rely on violence or cheap jump scares.  This is a genuinely tense movie.  I was glued to the screen and on the edge of my seat from start to finish.  Don’t get me wrong though.  There is some blood, and anyone who doesn’t like to see little kids die in gruesome manners should avoid this flick.  Check it out though, you won’t regret it.

Creepin' The Fuck Around

8/10

To The Devil... A Daughter

Hammer Studios final horror film.  Starring the always chilling Christopher Lee and the ALWAYS  beautiful Natassja Kinski (daughter of the insane Klaus).  The film concerns a rogue priest who believes in, you guessed it, the devil.  He has been raising Kinski as a nun from birth to be the new vessel for the the devil on her 18th birthday.

Christopher Lee not recanting.

This was a thoroughly creepy movie.  It had a dark atmosphere from the get go.  A couple scenes of nasty blood, and lots of suspense.  Christopher Lee is always a pleasure to watch.  He can be one of the creepiest men on film.  Overall this is a movie with a good plot, and good scares.  The only complaint I have is the FUCKING HORRIBLE LET DOWN of an ending.  The whole movie just keeps building and building to a horrible anticlimactic final thirty seconds.  Minus that, its a great flick.

Whatever could the devil worshippers done with her?

7/10 (For the first 92 minutes) 0/10 (Last thirty seconds)

The Vampire Lovers

Another adaptation of the novel Carmilla.  This one by Hammer Studios starring Ingrid Pitt and Madeline Smith as possibly the most beautiful couple ever put on film.  Marcilla (Ingrid Pitt) stays as a house guest at The Generals (Peter Cushing) home.  While there his daughter begins to get ill and villagers begin to mysteriously die.

Ingrid Pitt doing that thing where shes absolutely fucking gorgeous.

This was an excellent movie.  A little slow moving, but not boring.  Good plot, good sets, gorgeous actresses.  If you’re in the mood for an old school gothic vampire movie, with hints of erotocism, look no further.

Its only a flesh wound.

8/10

This movie made me: wish Ingrid Pitt would suck every drop of blood from my measly human body.

The Grapes of Death

A Jean Rollin zombie film.  This is the man who specializes in erotic vampire lesbian flicks.  So does he do a zombie flick any good?  Yes he does.  An infected batch of grapes used for wine turn villagers into zombie-like creatures.  They go mad and rot a bit.  Elizabeth fleas from a train with a zombie after her friend is killed and wanders around the French country side trying to find safety.

Boobs and blood in one shot!

This film has a very dream-like atmosphere.  The plot was original.  Infected grapes causing a zombie outbreak?  I’ve never seen it before.  Cool premise.  Of course this is Jean Rollin film so you get a bit of random nudity.  The blood isn’t scarce either.  The Grapes of Death was an original zombie film with a good atmosphere and some nice bloodshed.  Recommended.

ZOMBIES

9/10

Quick Reviews by Mozy

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Old School Review – “Maniac”

Maniac - Directed by William Lustig

Joe Spinell plays all-around, greasy psychopath Frank Zito in this grim little horror movie.  We follow frank as he stalks and eventually kills a bunch of random women.  This is due to his traumatic child hood where he suffered abuse from his equally insane mother.  Text book psychology there folks, you beat your kids, they’re going to be serial killers.

Joe Spinell - Now Extra Greasy!

The plot is a pretty standard guy-stalks-girl guy-kills-girl set up.  Our hero Frank likes to scalp his women and later put their scalps on mannequins he keeps neatly displayed around his little, dank apartment.  For such a simple set up, the movie moves along quite nicely and never gets boring.  We are treated with numerous scenes of Frank in his apartment talking to himself and his mannequins.  These scenes are by far more terrifying than any of the graphic murder sequences, and they are graphic.

You So pretty

Joe Spinell (who also co-wrote the screenplay) plays the role of his career here.  Not once did I feel like I was watching an actor.  He takes on the character.  The scenes of Frank isolated in his home contain some of the best solo-performances that can be seen in a horror movie.  Again, these scenes are without a doubt the highlight of the movie.  All of the actors around Spinell are decent.  Like to mention that Caroline Munro is fucking gorgeous as always.  Pretty much what you would expect from any low-budget 80s horror movie.  Tom Savini has a nice cameo as a disco boy trying to get his wiener wet.  This is the set-up for one of the best effects sequences in the movie.

Savini Before

Savini After

So on to the special effects then.  Tom Savini is the man responsible for all the blood you get to see in this movie, so the gore is top notch.  There is a ridiculously violent exploding-head from a shot gun scene (see above).  The majority of the blood is throat slits and scalping.  All done very good, of course.  The flick contains quite the bloody finale as well.

Maniac - Complete With 80s Boobs!

Speaking of the finale, the ending is also another one of the films extremely creepy sequences.  Gave me the heebie jeebies.  LOL ROFL.  Actually, the end is what I liked best about this movie.   Not excitingly original, but effective and nasty.

What's going on you ask? See it to find out.

If you are looking for a dark, violent, creepy horror movie, look no further.  This one has it all, a deliciously greasy psychopath, random women meeting a violent demise, and an ending that will leave you shaking in your panties.  Basically, you have a cross between a slasher flick and an inside-the-serial-killer’s head movie.  Again, not the most original movie ever, but sleazy and good enough that you’ll get your money’s worth.

9/10

Worth buying? Fuck yes.

Random link: http://roflrazzi.files.wordpress.com/2009/08/celebrity-pictures-nicolas-cage-stoic-crazy.jpg

Reviewed by Mozy

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Mother of Tears – Review

Mother of Tears

Ok so I am reviewing Mother of Tears basically because I just got to meet the amazing Dario Argento.  What a nice old man!  He seemed so happy to meet all of his fans and his Q and A at last weekends Monster Mania con was a joy to watch.  Anyway, enough bragging about meeting the Italian horror maestro.  On to the review…

Me with Argento!

Finally, The Mother of Tears.  The Third Mother.  The long awaited finale to Suspiria and Inferno.  Almost thirty years in the making.  Argento fans rejoice!  So, was it worth the wait?  Is the final act a worthy entry to the series?  We’ll get to that.

Outside of Rome an ancient urn is discovered.  Once the urn is opened a series of violence sweeps the city.  Including an ULTRA REALISTIC baby being thrown off of a bridge.  (Sarcasm, did ya catch it?)  Sarah Mandy is an art student who seems to be the only one who can stop the Third Mother from destroying Rome.  To be honest the plot is very paper thin.  There really isn’t too much going on.  Not that the first two flicks had an extremely well developed plot, but they certainly had much more substance than this one.  Once the basic premise kicks in and the ball gets rolling, the guts start pouring.

Guts Pouring

The acting in this film ranges from sub-par to mediocre at best.  Most of the performances seem over the top; especially the group of witches that show up about a third into the movie.  Basically, thy are really fucking annoying.  I’m not sure if they were trying to portray these women as scary, but their ridiculous presentation of their characters makes them come off as laughable, and kind of goth.  Asia Argento isn’t the best actress but she plays her part well.  Then again, I could be blinded by her being absolutely hot.  Adam James as her boss was a bit stale.  There is a scene where he is supposed to be distraught over his missing child; it is less than convincing.  But maybe that was the point, who the fuck likes kids anyway?  Udo Kier makes a good cameo.  He is only in the movie for a few minutes but he plays his part well.  Daria Nicolodi plays a small part as Asia Argento’s mother (Who is her mother in real life as well as the co-writer of Suspiria).  Her performance is again, over-the-top and a bit silly.  Overall the acting is not one of the films strong points.

The "Scary" Coven of Witches

Now if you like horror movies with straight up gore, you’re going to enjoy this.  Mother of Tears is a balls to the wall bloodbath.  The first murder sequence committed by three demon-like creatures is superb.  Even if there is a little monkey watching for no reason.  The make-up and gore effects in this movie are top notch.  The intestines are slimy and the blood is thick.  There is one great sequence where a character gets their face (and day) ruined with a meat cleaver.  With the exception of one or two things, all the effects are practical.  The couple parts that are CGI are a tad cheesy, but they are so few and far between it doesn’t really ruin the viewing.  But fuck CGI anyway.

Meat Cleaver!

Alright then, does the movie live up to its predecessors?  As much as I would have loved to tell you it does, it falls flat.  My biggest complaint is the lack of color.  Suspiria was filled with extremely vibrant lighting, and Inferno had even more, to the point where the whole movie felt dream-like.  Don’t get me wrong though, Mother of Tears is an entertaining ride.  Fast-paced, lots of gore, and even a quick lesbian scene for those who enjoy gratuitous nudity with their violence.

Some More Gore

Random Gratuitous Lesbian Scene!

If you’re looking for a fun horror movie, look no further, but if your looking for Argento’s return to form, this isn’t it.  Again though, its not a bad movie, its just average when it should have been great.

The Third and Hottest Mother

Overall:  See it if you like Argento or just want to watch a fun gore flick.

Current Movie Crush:  Still Timothy Olyphant, just watched Justified.

6/10

Reviewed by Mozy


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Old School Review – “The Burning”

The Burning

One year after Friday The 13th there was The Burning.  Another  kids go to camp, pork, and get chopped-the-fuck-up slasher movie. This one happens to be co-created by the lovely (and fat) Weinstein brothers, who get a lot of shit but I don’t dislike because they produce a lot of awesome newer movies (Tarentino and Rodriguez movies to be specific).  They claim that the script was written one year before Friday The 13th came out.  Which very well could be true but who knows.  Who cares?

Cropsy Getting BURNED

The movie opens up with a group of campers planning a prank to play on the caretaker.  Of course, things don’t go as planned and the caretaker ends up getting horribly burned and disfigured.  The Burning, get it?  Let me tell you, the smarts behind some of these movie titles.  Five years later our beautiful burn victim gets out of the hospital and goes back to his old stomping ground to get his revenge on the teens who wronged him, and really anyone he get get his hands on.  What sets the plot of this movie apart from the others of its kind?  Nothing really.  This is a standard camp slasher flick.  I wouldn’t say that works against it though.  This is still and enjoyable movie.  If you like boobs and blood.

Boobs!

Blood!

The acting is overall very stale.  The only real highlight is Jason Alexander of Seinfeld fame.  He is basically the comic relief and most likeable character in the movie.  Its also a little weird seeing him with hair, and in shape.  Everyone else is pretty wooden.  Another character Glazer, who is the camp asshole, is a very annoying turd ball.  Every time he graces us with his presence he proceeds to annoy the shit out of the audience.

Costanza

There are some pretty cool blood and gore effects in this movie.  Another one done by the man Tom Savini.  The best kill sequence is the famous raft scene.  Don’t be fooled, the scene is not near as epic as some would lead you to believe.  Do not have your hopes up for “the murder to scene to end all murder scenes”.  The raft part is simply a quick, energetic, murder scene that gets the audience going a little bit.  Not to underplay it, it is bad ass, and a little brutal.  I liked it a lot actually.  Then again I kept hearing how overrated the scene was before I saw the movie so my expectations weren’t that high.  Just watch the movie.

Lost some fingers.

Overall this was an entertaining flick.  Don’t watch this if you are looking for anything original.  If you’re in the mood for a fun, cheesy, 80s slasher movie then this should be right up your alley, because that is all this one is.  Cropsy!

The sweetest image from the movie.

I should also direct you to the good people at Fright Rags.  If you dig the movie a hell of a lot, and want the world to know.  Why not purchase a Burning t-shirt!!!!     http://www.fright-rags.com/the-burning-p-89.html

7/10 – The movie doesn’t get that high of rating for how well made it is, thats because I enjoyed it so much.

Current Mood: Loved lol :0p

Reviewed By Mozy

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Bad Ronald (1974)

Would you ever think a 1970’s TV movie could be amazing? Well that is the case with “Bad Ronald” which was originally broadcast in 1974 by ABC.

Now I’ve met awkward people, but Ronald (played by Scott Jacoby) takes the cake. I’m not sure, my friend Bill is probably the most awkward person I’ve ever met, and I am pretty sure Ronald and Bill would be best friends. I don’t think Bill would kill a little girl and bury her in a shallow grave.

Actually, he may do something like that, come to think of it. But who wouldn’t kill a little annoying brat who talks shit about your mom. Fuck her. She deserved to die. Bill, kill the cunt.

So anyway, the movie starts off with the protagonist, Ronald (one of those situations where our protagonist is also the antagonist) talking to his mother. Ronald is a geeky looking kid, almost looks like a young Howard Stern when he was 15 or 16. You can tell something is seriously wrong with Ronald’s mother, as she holds her side and Ronald runs to the shelf to grab her medicine. The diagnosis is unknown. Ronald is a senior in high school, and it is his birthday. Ronald’s parents were divorced ten years to the day of his birthday, which i would assume he turns 17 or 18.

Ronald is obsessed with this girl Laurie Matthews, and his mom gets mad “You shouldn’t waste your time with someone who doesn’t care!”. Bitchhhhhh. Well anyway Ronald goes to Laurie’s house, and she is having a pool party. Ronald’s social ineptness is perfect when Laurie asks what he is doing at her house. The way he says “Well I was just wandering around and thought I’d come by and see what you’re doing” is so perfect and makes me crack up with laughter every time. Scott Jacoby was perfect for this role. The people at the pool party taunt him, and he proceeds to leave.

Laurie’s little sister is riding on her bike and Ronald runs into her, knocking her over. The two proceed to have an argument, and her sister calls him weird. She also calls his mother weird, and that’s where you can see his eyes fill with rage. The argument builds, and Laurie’s sister slaps him. Ronald proceeds to push her over, and she busts her head wide open on a cement block.

That bitch is dead!

Ronald runs home and his jacket is covered with dirt, and his mom wonders what is going on. He tells her that he killed Laurie’s sister, Carol Matthews. He says it was an accident, and he also says that he buried her in a shallow grave. His mom freaks, but what mom wouldn’t. My mom would be like, “Well she got what was coming for her, you shoulda smaked her head on the block a few more times just to make sure the bitch was dead”. But that’s my mom.

The two ponder of ideas of what to do, and they come up with the most ingenious plot. That is, to hide him in the pantry of the house, and cover the door so no one would find him.

The next day, police come into the house and look around the house for him, to no avail. His mom tells him that she has to go the hospital. Days and days go by, and she doesn’t return from the hospital. She died unexpectedly, and during this time, Ronald created a fantasy world for himself — called “Atranta”. Ronald is slipping away into a state of psychosis and delirium, which will not be solved in a pretty manner.

A real estate agent brings people to the house and gives them a tour, while Ronald watches through little peep holes he created all around the house. The house is sold to a family, while Ronald is still hidden away. He is getting creepier by each scene, and while the family is gone for the day, Ronald decides to go sneak around the house to get some food to eat.

His nosy neighbor spots him, and in shock, she falls down the stairs and dies. Ronald decided to hide her body in the crawl space of the house.

The next day, the parents of the house decide to go out and leave their kids behind at the house. Ronald is slipping further and further into his state of psychosis and his fantasy world, and seeks his ‘princess’, for he is the ‘king’ of his fantasy. He decides to pick the younger sister of the family ‘Babs’, as the princess. He confronts her when she is alone and she tries to run away but Ronald captures her, and locks her in the basement.

Ronald writes a note pretending she is Babs and it says that she ran away. Babs older sister Ellen discovers the note and calls the police. They come and seach for clues, but later that evening, the sisters start hearing things. Ronald captured Ellen’s boyfriend and has him tied up in his hide-out. He makes enough noise so that Babs’s two older sister hears something, and they see a light coming from a small hole in the wall.

They discover someone is looking through the hole at them, and they scream. Ronald busts right through the wall with no hesitation. He runs outside of the house, and the police quickly come and arrest him.

All in all, this movie is excellent. For a tv movie, it is outstanding. The film really hits the spot in how strange it is, but has a decent enough script to keep you thoroughly entertained throughout. This is a must-see for all fans of B-movies and just strange, obscure films altogether. You WON’T be disappointed. Unfortunately, this is hard to find on DVD. You can find it on bootlegs at horror conventions, but you can buy it straight from WB Archives here

Review by DAWSON’S FREAK

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The Crazies – Review

Directed By Breck Eisner

Okay, another movie that looks like a zombie movie butt isn’t about zombies?  A rip-off of 28 Days later?  Only to the jack tards who aren’t familiar with the classics.  The Crazies is a remake of the 1973 bio-chemical horror flick by the gigantic and great George Romero.  A little town gets some man-made military chemicals in its water supply.  People who get contaminated and go, wait for it… CRAZY.  See the genius of the title?  Fucking incredible.  Anyway, I am a fan of the original flick.  Cool plot, some cool action, some cool outfits (The Military, I’m a sucker for a man in uniform).  Its not Romero’s best non-living dead flick, that would be Martin, or Creepshow.  No Martin, its my review so I pick.

Directed by George Romero

On to the new flick.  Was it good.  Well yes in fact, it was.  It did what all remakes should do, take the original concept and tone of the original, and put a new take on it.  The movie, for me anyway, had the same tone and atmosphere as the original.  I’m always right when it comes to this shit so the remake nailed the feel.  It had that “no hope – ever impending doom” feeling that Romero’s movie had.    My favorite thing about the movie was the military aspect.  Areas being quarantined and taken control of by the government freak me out.  Especially when all the civilians are left in the dark about what is going on.  The action was tight and never really let up.  The flick was never overly violent and bloody.  Which worked for this one.  A lot of the movie was just tense scene after tense scene.  The suspense was there, and the characters were likable so you can feel for their situation.  Now likable doesn’t mean they were deep.  They were most def (hip lingo) one dimensional lol.  I was in luck with this movie also as it happens to star my main man crush.  Timothy Olyphant.  I’ll see any movie with him.  Don’t know what it is about him (yes I do, he kicked major ass on Deadwood) but I love him.

I'm not saying i'd do him, but I would definitely turn red around him...

He was pretty kick ass as he town sheriff.  He was especially good at killing fuckers with a knife sticking though his hand.  Wasn’t I saying something about tension?  Oh yea, there is one pretty good sequence in a car wash.  The main group of people is hiding from a military helicopter in it.  So if they go out side, they get shot.  Inside the car wash, are a few infected people.  This scene was definitely a highlight of the movie.  It was filled with energy, suspense, and some blood. It also had an explosive finish.  Another thing I really liked was the ending.  Which I won’t ruin.  Not that its anything special, but they took it where I was hoping they would.  One thing I should also mention is that the crazy people in this, aren’t screaming, raving maniacs like in 28 Days Later or REC.  They can talk, and movie slowly, and they seem to be able to think.  They are just a little misguided.  Like, burn your house down and kill you wife and son misguided.  But who are we to judge how the infected live there life?

Should you see it?  Yea, you should.  Its a fresh new movie in the “Infected, not zombies” sub-genre.  Its a quick acting, tense, bloody, sometimes claustrophobic ride.  So go in knowing what you’re going to see and you won’t be disappointed.  Or you might, fuck you.

7/10

Reviewed By Mozy

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Black Dynamite review (special guest review by Fecal Spill)

Black Dynamite.  Fucking……Black Dynamite.  This film is above any kind of words that can be put down on paper, but since I am such a better writer than both of the Nick’s I have the best shot of conveying to you how amazing this film was.

To start let us discuss the main character of the movie.  Black Dynamite is a character that I can easily relate to, considering we both only good at two things – Kicking ass and having sex (I am also good at writing I don’t think I mentioned that yet).  Black Dynamite is the stereotypical “bad ass mother-shut yo’ mouth” character that anyone that has ever watched a Blaxploitation film has come to know and love.  He is a poet, a soldier, and a lover all rolled into one tight, delicious chocolate body.

The plot of the film starts off as a typical black community getting shit on by “The Man”, but after an amazing, roughly 25 second sequence where Black Dynamite basically resolves every one of the films problems, the black community’s problem escalates into one of a much greater and more sinister scale.  Black Dynamite and his revolutionaries have to put their ass kicking skills aside for a moment and band together to use their incredible deductive skills to figure out their next step.  Adding detective skills to Black Dynamite’s character definitely puts him above and beyond the Blaxploitation characters of old, and introduces us to the new breed of Blaxploitation stars.

The film’s overall cinematography, plus the fact that we watched it on my old projector in my basement gives a 100% authentic Grindhouse experience, and you actually feel like you are in a dirty old movie theatre in the 70’s, and there is actually a dirty old man with just a trench coat on who is touching himself every time a girl is topless (quite often in this film) a few rows back from you.  With films like this, and the internet series “Italian Spiderman”, one could pretend that we as a culture never moved on from that glorious decade.  A sweet, sweet thought, that could be turned into a reality if only more films were made like this one.

Lastly I have to touch on the film’s score, which is probably the most stand out feature of the film.  Adrian Younge creates a totally original score that perfectly fits the tone of the movie and completes the vintage feel.  In the moments of awkward silence between characters’ dialogue (half the movie), Younge’s music awkwardly busts in like Kramer entering Jerry’s apartment and gives you a 70’s boner. Several of the songs get straight to the point and just blatantly restate what is going on in the movie with its lyrics.  The music is just as revolutionary as the Black Dynamite and his crew fighting “The Man”.

Overall, this is the best homage/spoof movie I have ever seen.  Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino really made headway for people to make movies like this with their Grindhouse film, but while their movie was hit and miss, this movie was 99% perfect.  What is that 1% that is wrong with the film you ask?  Well frankly there was just too many niggers in it for my taste, but that’s just me.

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Jennifer’s Body Review

jennifers_body_poster1

Jennifer’s Body.  I was excited about this one when I first heard the news.  Diablo Cody writing a horror movie?  I wasn’t a big fan of Juno, but I still know it was a good movie.  Plus, the little references in that flick to Dario Argento and H.G. Lewis.  Cody knows her shit when it comes to horror.  So I had every reason to be excited.

Flash forward to seeing the first trailer.  Ehhh…  Didn’t look that great.  Whatever, I decide going to see Megan Fox eat some dudes should be entertaining enough.  And Amanda Sayfried is one of the most beautiful actresses to grace the screen.

megan-fox-jennifers-body

The review.  Jennifer’s Body is overall a very entertaining horror movie.  It is by no means a great movie, just mindless fun.  Megan Fox defnitley got annoying after five minutes but i’m sure that was what they were going for.  Amanda Seyfried was good as the meek counter part to the bitchy Jennifer.  Of course she was good though.  Adam Brody, and the rest of the guys playing the satan-worshipping rock band Low Shoulder stole the show though.  They were only in a couple scenes, but one particular sacrifice scene was absolutley hilarious.  The plot was ok, nothing outstanding, but served as a vehicle for a fun popcorn movie.  My biggest complaint was the lack of gore.  Everytime someone got killed, it was off screen.  We get to see the aftermath a couple times which was cool.  I’m not asking for an overload of blood, but when I go to see a movie about a hot chick that eats dudes, id like to see some meat.

One thing I would like to praise is some of the angles that were chosen for this movie.  There are a few shots that stand out because they are so epic feeling in scope.  One in perticular shot of a long street at night with a bunch of abandoned looking houses that are all carbon copies of each other is awesome.  I guess I really can’t explain, just see it.

So yea, overall the movie was fun.  Nothing ground breaking, not an excellent piece of film making, just fun. It’ll give you a wettie.

6/10

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